1. 23 September 2011 · 01:12 PM ·

    The spell.

    I knew from the beginning that she already belonged to someone else, but please tell me how not to fall in love with her, it was rather impossible for me.

    She was a spell that was put on me. I couldn’t escape from everything about her. The thoughts of her were always haunting me. When I looked through her brown eyes, I found my peace. She was my muse, my inspiration. She was magnificent. But, seeing her and having her around me everyday was a curse. A sweet painful curse.

    “I think I am in like with you,” that was my confession.
    Surprisingly, she said she liked me too. I thought I would die when I heard her, I was beyond my bliss. There I remember, she was putting another cruel curse. She said, “but you really shouldn’t like me in the first place, I don’t know if I can like you as much as you do. I don’t even know if I can be with you. I can’t give you assurance.”

    Everyday the spell was getting stronger as I felt that my feelings for her grew stronger too. I surrendered myself to her grace. I was falling to embrace. God, I love her and I didn’t care what was going on the future. All I cared about that she has feelings for me too and as long as I could see her and having her around me everyday that was enough.

    I love her.

    I was anxious at that time, while I was waiting for her at our favourite coffee shop downtown. He found out about us. But he said he wouldn’t let her go. And neither do I. That was why I told her to make a decision, stay with him or leave with me. I was ready to start everything over again in the new town and I could throw everything away just to be with her.

    Five minutes to 5 pm but she still hadn’t come yet.

    Fifteen minutes, an hour, two hours, three hours, I waited for her there. She didn’t come. She didn’t even say a word. I was left with so many questions. Was this her answer? Even if this was her answer, at least she could say good bye.

    Later on that night, I got a phone call. It was from him, her lover. That was the last thing I expected to happen.

    “She died, on a car accident in that junction 4 blocks from her place. He didn’t choose you or choose me. She died.”

    I felt like I was hit by a lightning. I felt dead. But I needed to know only one thing.

    “Was she about to turn left or turn right on that junction?”

    “Her car was found crushed on the middle of the junction. Only God and her who knew which way she wanted to go.”

    I just needed to know about it. If she was going to turn left in that junction, it would mean that she was going into my direction. If she was going to turn right, she was going into his direction.

    It was sad, until the very end. I could never know her true feelings. I could never know if she was going on my direction to meet me. I never knew whether she was going to break the curse on me. The spell that was put on me was indeed a really cruel curse.